We Interrupt the Usual Ramblings About Trips and Kids...

to say, briefly, that my kids? They miss their dad. This is not as dramatic as maybe i'm making it sound, so i will explain.

About two years ago, Doug's company was "reorganized." We fully expected to have to move to DC. Then 10 months after they were reorganized and things were looking stable and we were about to put our house on the market, another reorg was announced. At that point, we said we were unwilling to move until all the players (directors and VPs above Doug) were named and things calmed down a bit. We know of people who were told they had to move to DC, did so, and are now being told they could have stayed here after all.

I don't want to complain about this, because in the current economic conditions we are all aware of and living in, we have been very very lucky. Blessed. Whatever you want to call it. Doug has most certainly had a job. The bills are paid. We haven't had to worry much.

The problem? For the past year he has been working no less than 65 hours a week. 80 hour weeks are not unheard of. For some out there, this is normal and OK. For us? This is not OK. The company within the corporation that we moved to Colorado to work for has essentially been dissolved and the pieces strewn all over the DC area. The new company has proven to be inefficient, redundant; etc. Doug still does not have a permanent director over him. And he's had a really hard time getting the people hired to work for him that he wants in the positions. Most recently, a job he's been trying to fill for 6 months has now been put on hold because there's a corporate-wide hiring freeze. What it has meant, in a nutshell, is that Doug has been trying to do his job, his boss' job, and the jobs of a number of people below him. He's left working crazy hours and feeling very frustrated. His typical day--he's gone by 7AM. Home by 6 to see the kids and help get them to bed by 7 (when and if he can. And when he can? I reeeally appreciate it). And then he works from home until anywhere from 10pm to 2am. Literally for the past year this is his life. He's not happy. He's not healthy. He hasn't taken time off this year. He didn't take time off when i had Soren. He went with us to DC earlier this month but worked the entire time. Something needs to change. Maybe if he were being compensated for his time and we were making a kazillion dollars and squirrelling it away and dreaming of an earlier retirement? No. In fact, he was "promoted" over a year ago, promised an increase in level and pay. This hasn't happened.

I realized a few weeks ago that the boys, or at least Bode, are feeling this change. Bode asked about Doug coming home and playing with them and i was kind of short with him in my response (in part because he'd started asking me that a lot lately). But i realized after i snapped at him what his question really meant. WHERE IS DAD? Not to be unfair to Doug, but he's so tired. And stressed. And unhappy that he's just different and that is noted by the kids. Physical absence and personality change. I explained to Bode what was going on and that Doug doesn't like it either. Which is true.

Doug is now seriously seeking other employment, in a job market that isn't so hot. But he's at least feeling like he's doing what he can to change the current situation (he's also had a number of discussions with his VP). I think for so long he's just been pushing through and trying to tolerate things but now he sees that this isn't a good way to live and that there are, in fact, other options out there if we're willing to be patient. We very seriously considered a job in Durango (the job announcement that got the job search rolling) but realized that as much as we think we'd love to live in a small mountain town, it's probably not the case (like people who think they want to live on a farm who grew up in the city). Too remote. Too small. The closest Costco is 4 hours away in Albequerque--but BONUS! there's a Trader Joe's there, too!

Oh. And did i mention that last week they started yet ANOTHER reorg? Three reorgs in less than 2 years.

Anyway. So. That's where we're at right now. And here i sit online this evening as Doug is in the other room "at work" on his laptop. Thus it has been for the past 12 months. I'm hoping for a positive change sometime soon.